The Best Mom Ever

Or so I'm told...

It's Hard Work. Period.

I am feeling very annoyed. I am a mom. I also work outside the home. Because I have to. I would LOVE to be able to stay home with my kids, you have no idea.

I do have an identity. I had a career before my children were born, I have a job to pay the bills now, and I will have a career when the children are older. I will always be a mom, but that is my primary job now.

Number One Son & Queenie are in elementary school, so they are in school most of the day and The Flying Monkey is preschool aged. I get more time with them than most working moms, so don't get me wrong, I am NOT complaining.

But here is what I hate. It annoys me to no end to hear a stay at home mom complain. Well, let me finish. It annoys me to hear a stay at home mom complain about silly things like having to go to the grocery store, or not "getting a break." Really? I know being a mom is a hard job. Really. It's hard all around, no matter what else you do on top of it. And being a stay at home mom is not a picnic. It's not soap operas and bon bons. If you're doing it right.

"I have so much to do today. I have to do laundry and vacuum and start dinner. And don't forget I have to do a craft with Junior. I just don't know if I'm going to be able to make it to the grocery store today."

Give me a break. This is no disrespect to my SAHM friends, who I am extremely jealous of. I'll admit it. Thankfully, none of my SAHM friends complain like that. They are all fun moms who make me laugh and smile and want to be like them.

And I used to stay at home, briefly, when Number One Son was a toddler and I was pregnant with Queenie. So, I DO understand needing a "break" every once in a while. Grown up conversations every now and then are necessities. Ha!

I could go through my day and see how busy I am, but it's not about who's more busy. It's not a competition about who is more busy, who is the better mom, who can do more, who has it better.
It's about being a mom. Period. Don't complain about how bad you have it and how tired you are, when people would kill to be able to spend half the time with their children that you do.

And as much as we love being at home with our children, not everyone can afford that luxury and it does no good to make someone feel bad about not being able to do it. My beautiful Marvelous Marie will testify to that.

I have a great job. I can drop my older children off at school, I take the youngest with me, I can pick the others up from school and go home in the afternoon with everyone and we have time together. I don't complain. Well, I do complain about my job, but NOT the schedule! :)

I'll tell you why this was all over me today. I would do anything to be able to be at home all day with my kids. Really. But I can't, and it's ok. I'm not mad about it.
But I encountered a woman today who doesn't do anything but take her children to preschool and go play tennis or shop. And she was complaining about how she never had time for herself and never had time to do this or do that. And that she never had a break from children and her house was a wreck because of all this.
What do you do 5 mornings a week while your angel is at preschool? Just curious.

So, I apologize if I've offended anyone with my post. I didn't mean to. Like I said, it's not directed at SAHM's in general. Since I am a Wannabe SAHM.

And I imagine anyone who fits the bill doesn't enjoy the Boss Lady's posts anyway, so I'm probably ok.

So, here I am signing off,
A Mom.

Outbreak

We're just passing germs around our house. We can't get well! Everyone is home today (except DH) and I have to be honest: The Boss Lady is miserable. There is no rest to be had in a house with 3 children aged 8, 6 & 3 trying to do anything to not be bored.

So here are some photos of me with my precious three having fun, not being sick. Enjoy!

Number One Son is a fabulous dancer

Queenie gives great hugs

We can't let The Flying Monkey fly all the time

Mom, Not in Front of My Friends...

So my daughter (hereafter known as Queenie) spent the entire afternoon on the phone with Lucy. I had to ask her to hang up twice so I could use the phone. Then my son (hereafter known as Number One Son) spent his afternoon riding the neighborhood on his bike with Charles, taking a break for dinner, while on the walkie talkie with said friend, out again to ride with said friend.
I followed Number One Son out into the driveway to tell him to watch for cars as it was the afternoon drive time and our neighborhood is used as a cut through. I watched him ride across the street in front of a car (whose driver was thankfully paying attention and driving slowly). I motioned for him to come back and said sternly "Bike Ride Over."
Number One Son pedaled over and said, "Mom, not in front of Charles..."

I get that a lot these days as Number One Son and Queenie struggle to grow up and show me how independent they are, while at the same time struggling because they still need me for so many things. I feel the same way.

Sometimes I wish they could do everything for themselves, man oh man, I would have soooo much more time on my hands! But I know that's not really true! The day my children drive off in that car for the first time, that first date, college, I can't even think about right now, it's just bringing tears to my eyes just imagining it! I'm going to be a basket case.

OK, not in front of Charles, but don't expect me to let go just yet. I'm holding on to all of them (even the precious little one who is hereafter known as The Flying Monkey) until the absolute last moment I can. I'll let them be independent, but I'll be just out of sight, still able to see what they're doing, still able to hear them call for help. And I'll be there sooner than they can imagine.

So I let NOS ride with Charles, but I was posted very inconspicuously on the corner, where I didn't miss a thing. Listening to Queenie talk on the phone, watching NOS ride, The Flying Monkey on my back. (No pun intended)

Always just within reach.

Oblivious

I know you have all encountered people who are oblivious to the world around them. Oblivious that there are other people going through life around them. You know, those who are busy talking on their cell phone in the grocery store check out line loudly enough for the butcher in the back of the store to hear. Just an example.
I know I have been guilty of being oblivious myself, but I do try not to be.

I had to go have a wonderful pap smear & mammogram today, always a joy, a yearly appointment I look forward to with great anticipation. Not really. My doctor's office treats a melting pot of patients, from women in for routine checkups, moms having prenatal exams, postnatal exams, women battling infertility issues to women dealing with serious health issues such as cancer.
I encountered an "obliviot" this morning while in the "2nd waiting area." (I love that obliviot term - I'll try not to use it often, as I did not create it)

This lovely young woman (I guess she was a woman as she was visibly pregnant) was waiting in the waiting area, obviously for a prenatal visit. She looked all of 15. Really. And she had a cute little boy with her, a toddler, probably not quite 2 years old. He called her Mama, so I assume he was hers too.

Her apparent age is not what griped me, for age does not equal obliviousness. (Some of the most considerate people I've ever met are young while some of the most oblivious people I've ever encountered are old & crotchety) What I found annoying was her need for all the women in the waiting area to look and smile and comment on her precious little one. She would talk to him, smile, and look at all of us for approval. Granted, he was adorable. But like I said, this office treats a variety of health issues. How arrogant for her to look to the woman next to her for smiles about her baby. That woman might just be infertile and have wanted a child for years and the teenager next to her with 2 babies is rubbing it in her face.

OK, yeah, that probably was not the case and this young woman was probably just blessed with good young genes. But do you get my point?

My son has speech issues. He is almost 4 and we struggle to understand pretty much everything he says. This toddler I was sitting next to this morning spoke much more clearly than my son does. It makes me sad for him when I encounter children who are at the level where I think he should be. But I very rarely say it out loud. Because there are plenty of children out there with much more serious problems. They have health problems affecting their quality of life. We are so very blessed to have wonderful, beautiful & healthy children and if we have to go to speech therapy with one of them a few times a week, so be it. I am not oblivious enough to think that my child's verbal communication problems are the end of the world.

OK, so I guess you're about to ask, what is your point, Boss Lady, and how exactly what this poor girl you're dumping on being oblivious?
Well, now that I've typed it all out, nothing, I guess. Other than bringing her forty-leven bags of toys to an OB/GYN appointment for her toddler to play with in the waiting area. And the "look at me & my cute kid" face she brought in there as well.

I should've brought my kids. Talk about cuties! Then someone would be blogging about me.