Monday, August 16, 2010

Fashion or Respect?

Ok, so I've never really thought of myself as old school. Yes, I'm getting older, and there are plenty of things that the younger generation is into that I totally do not understand.
But I know the same was true when I was a teenager and in my 20's. So I try to be pretty open minded.
But there are a few things that many consider "old school" that I think are non-negotiables when it comes to etiquette and respect. For example:
  • Saying "Yes/No Ma'am" & Yes/No Sir"
  • Saying "Please" & "Thank You"
  • Standing & placing one's hand over their heart during the Pledge of Allegiance & the National Anthem
  • Removing one's hat during the Pledge of Allegiance & the National Anthem.
Now, some of you may think these are old fashioned or Southern traditions. I could agree that saying Yes/No Ma'am might be considered a Southern thing. But the other things are simple respect issues.

Let me tell you what has brought this on. My family attends a wonderful church that has a "traditional" worship service with organ & hymns and a more "contemporary" service that has a worship band. They are very talented, great music. Here's where I go crazy. The members of the band are so ridiculously stylish. They walk around campus like they're the Beatles. It drives me nuts. But I've gradually gotten past that, it's not about me, it's not about them, I'm closing my eyes & worshiping. Right? Ok.
The stylish part? Yeah, these hats that you may have seen guys wearing these days, they look like train engineer hats to me. I think they're ugly, but what do I know, right? My issue is not the hats, you can dress like a purple dinosaur if you want. My issue is the fact that they wear them while they are on the stage singing, worshiping & praying. They never take them off.
Is it just me, or is that disrespectful? I think it is.

Now, let me be clear about this; I don't mean people should only be dressed a certain way in order to walk through the doors of a church. That's what it's all about either. I mean, for example, if a teenage boy walks into church with a hat on, no one needs to embarrass him by telling him to take off his hat. That actually happened to someone I know when they were a kid & was detrimental to their attitude toward church as an adolescent.
But I do think that people in church leadership should be just that. Leaders. In how they act, what they do & what they say. That means not doing anything that could be a distraction or a stumbling block.

Anyway, it's not a deal breaker. I like our church. DH likes our church. Our kids love our church. And I think all our church leaders are incredible people. I certainly don't think that the worship band guys are not good people just because they wear dumb hats onstage. I've just personally found it to be quite distracting. Worship is about God. Not the look, not the style, not even the music.

So I guess I really am "old school." But it's not about jeans. It's not about t-shirts. It's not about tattoos. It's not about pearls & heels. It's not about suits & ties. It's about simple respect. It's a given that when you're at a baseball game, a car race, or an air show, the hats come off during the pledge & anthem. Shouldn't we show God the same respect??

4 comments:

Stephanie said...

Hmm...I guess I don't neccessarily disagree with you, but I don't think it would bother me either. In fact, I'm not sure if I would even notice it.

Wanna know what I am old school about? I think it is rude & completely disrespectful not to pull over for a funeral procession and just plain ignorant not to pull over for an ambulance, fire truck or police officer.

Boss Lady said...

It does sound like a nit picky thing, when you write it out, I know. I think it became a problem for me when my son pointed out one Sunday that the "singers" didn't take off their hats during the prayer. That started the whole thought process...
I agree, that is something that people don't seem to do anymore either. And I also agree, it is very disrespectful.

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