Fashion or Respect?

Ok, so I've never really thought of myself as old school. Yes, I'm getting older, and there are plenty of things that the younger generation is into that I totally do not understand.
But I know the same was true when I was a teenager and in my 20's. So I try to be pretty open minded.
But there are a few things that many consider "old school" that I think are non-negotiables when it comes to etiquette and respect. For example:

• Saying "Yes/No Ma'am" & Yes/No Sir"
• Saying "Please" & "Thank You"
• Standing & placing one's hand over their heart during the Pledge of Allegiance & the National Anthem
• Removing one's hat during the Pledge of Allegiance & the National Anthem.

Now, some of you may think these are old fashioned or Southern traditions. I could agree that saying Yes/No Ma'am might be considered a Southern thing. But the other things are simple respect issues.

Let me tell you what has brought this on. My family attends a wonderful church that has a "traditional" worship service with organ & hymns and a more "contemporary" service that has a worship band. They are very talented, great music. Here's where I go crazy. The members of the band are so ridiculously stylish. They walk around campus like they're the Beatles. It drives me nuts. But I've gradually gotten past that, it's not about me, it's not about them, I'm closing my eyes & worshiping. Right? Ok.
The stylish part? Yeah, these hats that you may have seen guys wearing these days, they look like train engineer hats to me. I think they're ugly, but what do I know, right? My issue is not the hats, you can dress like a purple dinosaur if you want. My issue is the fact that they wear them while they are on the stage singing, worshiping & praying. They never take them off.
Is it just me, or is that disrespectful? I think it is.

Now, let me be clear about this; I don't mean people should only be dressed a certain way in order to walk through the doors of a church. That's what it's all about either. I mean, for example, if a teenage boy walks into church with a hat on, no one needs to embarrass him by telling him to take off his hat. That actually happened to someone I know when they were a kid & was detrimental to their attitude toward church as an adolescent.
But I do think that people in church leadership should be just that. Leaders. In how they act, what they do & what they say. That means not doing anything that could be a distraction or a stumbling block.

Anyway, it's not a deal breaker. I like our church. DH likes our church. Our kids love our church. And I think all our church leaders are incredible people. I certainly don't think that the worship band guys are not good people just because they wear dumb hats onstage. I've just personally found it to be quite distracting. Worship is about God. Not the look, not the style, not even the music.

So I guess I really am "old school." But it's not about jeans. It's not about t-shirts. It's not about tattoos. It's not about pearls & heels. It's not about suits & ties. It's about simple respect. It's a given that when you're at a baseball game, a car race, or an air show, the hats come off during the pledge & anthem. Shouldn't we show God the same respect??

We Schedule Those Now?

Overheard at church office, while new pastor walks by calendar on his way out:

Pastor: Church Drama Meeting?
Secretary: (pointing to calendar) Yes!
Pastor: We schedule those now?

Has the Bible Changed?

That is the question you'll hear people in a church ask who are opposed to change.

I don't think I've mentioned this before, but I work in a church. I am actually the weekday preschool director at a small church in a metropolitan suburb. It didn't used to be a small church. It used to be "the place to be." But like everything else, things change. Pop culture changes. Technology changes. People change. Communities change.

"We've never done it that way before."
"Why do we have to change it?"
"Every time someone new comes in, we change things."

This church is full of old people and grumpy people. Sorry to sound ugly, but that's the way it is. And some of the grumpy people are young, so that's not a hand in hand thing. The majority of the young families have gone on to other places. They are thinking of their children. They want to be entertained. That is the society we live in. It may not be ideal, but if we want to reach a community for Christ and that community wants to be entertained, then entertain them. Be bold and exciting! Why can't churches make worship fun? I don't care what style music it has, make it fun! I don't think Jesus was boring, anyway. People flocked to follow him. He must have had a magnetic personality.

So, here's where I back pedal. Not all life and vitality comes from the young. So my apologies for the elderly grumpy pants photo. It was the funniest one I found. That's all. There are a lot of wonderful people at this church who want life and vitality and excitement and who are over age 60. But the future of the church is with the young. That's the reality.

This is such a random all over the place post, but it just crawled all over me today. It was a bad day, just dumb church stuff. But for example, I heard a couple of teachers fussing about the church not paying their nursery workers anymore. Huh? Why should a church pay their members to serve? Then the ranting about the new children's minister changing everything started. This church is struggling financially because people have left and some of the ones who are still there are not tithing for one reason or another. They even let a secretary go because they couldn't afford to pay her. Come on. Again, if they're struggling financially, why pay church members when they should be serving? (again, these are church members, not staff members, that's a different matter) Church members should serve willingly in an area they enjoy.

I sound like I am talking out of both sides of my mouth, serve but be entertained. But I'm not. It can be both ways! Church can be fun! It should be fun! I want my children to know that being a Christian is fun! I also want them to serve with a joyful willing heart! Not because they'll get something in return!

That is not what Christ modeled. He served, he washed people's feet, he got water from wells, he was the friend of the friendless.

The Bible hasn't changed, but if the world around it changes, changes should be made in how it is presented. Example: Leave it to Beaver was a hit in 1957. The Brady Bunch was a hit in 1969. The Office is a hit in 2008. We all still love to laugh, but the way sitcoms get us to laugh has changed over the years.

Again, I say, no. The Bible has not changed. It is still the instruction book we use to get through life on this earth. But yes, we do need to occasionally change up the way we read it. The way we present it. I'll dress up and read a book for Number One Son's class and they love it! I don't have to do that with Queenie's class, but I do have to read it with excitement for both!

And I certainly hope that I model a joyful servant life for my children, my family and my friends.

What is Your Title?

So, here's the 411 on Boss Lady here. I love God, I am a Christ follower. Now, I say it that way because I feel like the term "Christian" while very descriptive (it means "Little Christ") is way overused. A bit like "Awesome" or "Fabulous" or even "Love." I am a Christian in the fact that I believe Jesus Christ died for me and was resurrected 3 days later. I also strive to live like Christ ("Little Christ").
OK, so that in itself doesn't make me special or any different from any other church attender, does it? I'll answer that for you. No.
But there's more to being a Christ Follower than just believing Jesus is the Son of God. It involves demonstrating to others that you are a Christ Follower. Not by wearing your "I'm a Christian" t-shirt. By acting like one. Basic Golden Rule here. Do unto others as you would have them do unto you. I tell my children that on a daily basis. Treat others the way you want to be treated. That is what Christ did when he walked among us. He hung around with prostitutes and criminals (tax collectors were specifically named, but that's another blog topic). He didn't hang around with lily white church people who roll their eyes at torn blue jeans or black eyeliner. In fact, he condemned the self righteousness of the Pharisees.
So, what I'm getting at is that I sincerely hope that as a Christ Follower I help people see Christ. Because they're certainly not going to see Him in some churches these days. Some of the most hateful, selfish, self righteous, mean people I have ever met in my life were church people. Yes, it IS sad.
I spent many many years of my life in a Baptist minister's household. And I met some wonderfully kind people in those years, many of whom I am friends with to this day. I also met some frighteningly mean spirited people who didn't seem to care who they hurt along the selfish way.
Now, before you think that I am cynical and sad in need of some major quiet time, hear me out. Yes, I am cynical. I admit it. But I do love my God and I am doing all I can to instill the foundation for that love in my children. We go to an incredible church that is very "non-churchy." Worshiping God, being fed from the Word in such a creative way, and going to a place where my children beg to go is a very exciting . We have met some great friends there as well.
But I am ever cautious, I don't trust church people. I probably won't for quite some time. That's sad as well. But it's something we're working on.
But here is the good news. I'm a CHRIST Follower. Not a Church People Follower.
Church people don't love me unconditionally. Obviously.
Christ does.
Church people don't continue to smile and be proud of me when I make the wrong choice.
Christ does.
Church people don't sacrifice their life for me.
Christ did.
And I am so glad He did.
My goal is not to be a "Church Person." I want to be a "Christ Follower."
The two are very different indeed.